Venusians and Martians welcome each other, love each other. They develop selective amnesia Both the Martians and Venusians forgot they were from different planets and were suppose to be different. Because what they knew about these differences between men and women had been forgotton, men and women have lived in conflict since.Because we have forgotton we now think that our opposite sex spouse or partner is suppose to "want what we want" and "feel the way we feel". "We mistakenly assume that if our partners love us they will react and behave in certain ways-the ways we react and behave when we love someone."
An overview of our differences
Our values are different
We cope with stress differently
Men are motivated when they feel needed while women are motivated when they feel cherished
Misunderstandings occur because men and women speak different languages
Men and Women have different needs for intimacy Men and Women "keep score" differently
Men and Women hide feelings differently
Good Intentions Are Not Enough
"Falling in love is magical. It feels eternal, as if love will last forever." As we bask in this new love, we don't see how we could possiblely have the same problems that our parent had. We feel invincible. We expect our partner to feel the same as we, now and forever. Then daily life, creeps in, problems do arise and the importance of communication, how we react to each other, how we interrupt each others needs, feelings, kick in and we are thrust into conflict because we don't feel the same." When men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom." Then the author leaves the chapter on this profound note;"By validating and accepting our differences, creative solutions can be discovered whereby we can succeed in getting what we want. And, more important, we can learn how to best love and support the people we care about. Love is magical, and it can last, if we remember our differences."